roar/meow

Elias has neatly divided the animal kingdom into two groups: those who roar and those who meow. This is not as easy as it might seem. Sure, you say, lions roar. Sure, kittens meow. But what do you do about frogs? (they roar) And giraffes? (they meow) And birds? (they roar) And the back of Daddy's head on a pillow? (it meows). 

I'm not sure exactly on what basis he makes the call, but he always has a ready answer.  One of the funnier ones is the roaring cattle. I mean– they really are FEROCIOUS  with the roaring.  So too the vicious pigs. BBBRRRROOOOOAAAAARRRR! says the cow. The meowing  is along the lines of  a squeaky hinge.  No beginning or end, so to speak, just single high note. Bears meow like this and all need lots of cuddling. Perhaps fuzziness is one of the criteria for meowing…?

Elias also talks… a lot… with gusto. He often gestures, too, and comes off like a foreign motivational speaker. Sometimes he seems like John Belushi in the Samuri Deli. He has a karate sort of chop gesture that is like both hands coming close together, with great emphasis, but not meeting. He does this while lecturing vigorously. If only we could determine the topic of the speech I'm sure it would be very enlightening. Seems his language has a lot of th's and l's and w's thrown in and is a language of great fire and passion. 

Now and then he comes out with a word in English. Like "HOT!" he said one time, totally appropriately, never to repeat it. And occasionally he sees Daddy and remarks, simply, "Dad'n." He also now and then refers to Baden-Baden, which I believe is in Germany and perhaps is a good place to go if you have consumption. Anyway, it makes him seem all the more sophisticated, especially in light of his persistent downy baldness and incredibly short stature. 

The other night Isaac turned to Ben at dinner and fixed him in something of a cold gaze. "Daddy," he announced. "You are a hairless ape." Ben immediately glared at me, as if I was clearly at the bottom of this. Actually I had nothing to do with it. It's a prehistoric program Isaac has been watching. (The Walking with Dinosaurs series from the BBC is incredible.) IT told Isaac that we are all hairless apes. Anyway, I shrugged and agreed with Isaac. Long ago I was an anthropology major… "It's true," I said. "SEE?" said Isaac. Ben returned to eating with feathers slightly ruffled. 

I'm pretty sure that hairless apes would roar, given the options.  

 

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