A rough morning with Isaac

This morning Isaac started the day refusing to go to school. Those were his first words, "I'm not going to school today." I maintained that he was indeed going to school today and what ensued was about two hours of struggle. I won, in the end, which is the main point. But now I'm exhausted and emotionally drained and it's only 9:45 a.m. I'm not a big drinker, but a fifth of Jack Daniels sounds pretty appealing to me right now.

Let's review the victories:

1. I won. He is now in the school building attending class. Only a half hour late, and there's a snow storm going on too!
2. I did not beat him to a pulp or actually harm him in any way. I did not scream hysterically nor shake him till his teeth rattled. I called Ben and he talked me down. We got through it with a cold and steely resolve and no screaming and no violence.
3. I won.

But this leaves me with some questions. If we go through this now, does that mean that it will be smooth sailing when he's 16? Or, will it just be one steady and endless tooth and nail struggle until he's a grown person? At which point, presumably, it will only continue albeit long-distance?

Which brings me to another question: where did I go wrong? How is it that a nice and charming person like myself has a hell cat like this for a child? Oh yes… I remember now. A whole bunch of reasons, some of which are circumstantial, but many of which lay squarely at my own feet:

1. We lost our first born. When Isaac came into the world, I wanted nothing more than to tend to his every need.
2. My own childhood– not to go all Little Match Girl on you– but was pretty Little Match Girl at times.
3. I read a lot of attachment parenting books, and came into motherhood at a time when over-parenting and over-indulgence was all the rage.
4. I left work to be his mother, and thus turned all my talents and skills to the task of meeting his every need, nurturing every little spark of interest, and soothing every slight difficulty in his path.
5. Isaac came into the world an exceptionally intense, intelligent, sensitive, needy, and high-strung person. He can feel the seams in his clothing– and they bother him.

Yep. There you have it. It's something of a perfect storm. The question now is how to right the ship?